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Unhealthy Relationships

Close your eyes and IOCata various parts of your body: your right big toe, the end of your nose. Be aware of your breathing, without trying to control it controlling iS right-handed.

And so on. Finally, attend your emotions. What is your mood right now: tranannoyed? Transfer some part of the previous experience to your symbolic right hand.

As evocatively as possible, verbally describe something of what you have just sensed or felt to a friend or write about it or draw it.

A measure of your ambidexterity in this exercise is your ability to convey your experience to someone else. The notion of internal transfer from left to right hands is so important to healthy thinking generally that I will underline it further, going now to the writings of psychologist Abraham Maslow.

In a pleasant setting, spend et least ten minutes attending your sensations and feelings, and avoiding such symbolically right-handed activities as inner speech and self-evaluation.

Begin by closing your eyes and listening to the sounds of your environment. Be aware only of sounds: let all else retreat into the background of your awareness.

Labeling is rtght-handed and restricts full sensory experience. After listening for several minutes to sounds, take a slow stroll, first touching things, then smelling, then seeing.

The ambidextrous thinker is, of course, activeiy left-handed: is he consequently open to sinister impulses? Is it because he has good reason to be fearful?

Does evil lurk within, held in check only by the law-abiding discipline of the symbolic right hand? Opinion on this question is mixed. Freud, whose insights were derived largely from his observations of mentally ill patients.

He concluded, along with many Western theologians and philosophers, that human nature is inherently faulted by instinctual drives which can be held in check only by the civilized, law-abiding right hand.

Maslow, by contrast, obtained a more optimistic view by studying extraordinarily healthy people. We are learning that complete health means being available to yourself at all levels.

No longer can we dichotomize ourselves into a devil and a saint. We can now see this as an illegitimate dichotomy. Certainly we cannot use hard facts: neither the Freudian nor the Maslowian theory has been verified scientifically.

We must wait for more knowledge. Nor can anyone who has known a fully functioning, creative person, or who is aware of a culture that does not know violence or war such as the Malaysian Senoi tribe-see Chapter 16 take a strong stand against the optimism of Maslow.

According to R. Laing, psychosis is, for many individuals, a necessary step toward mental health, and should be treated that way.

Is creativity sinister? Profoundly creative men are frequently treated as dangerous lunatics: the Romans deemed Christ sinister. Is oain sinister?

Individuals who have full access to their left hand who are aware of their senses, open to their feelings, in touch with their unconscious inevitably experience more of everythingmore pleasure, and also more pain.

If the left hand is sinister, then how should we characterize an overly repressive right hand? In the cartoon by Jules Feiffer Figure 3-l , notice which hand is holding the gun.

By contrast, the individual who is afraid of his unconscious has limited access to this vital source of his being. He is, in other words, blocked from full functioning: fearing himself, he can utilize only that safe, enculturated, law-abiding side of himself which we have called right-handed.

A major purpose of experiences in visual thinking is to gently take the symbolic left hand out of the cast in which society and education has immobilized it, to give it some exercise, and to put it to work in unity with the right.

Then, in alert and waking subjects, the secondary processes of directed thought select among those objects and develop them further.

If these objects receive no secondary elaboration, as in some dreams and disorganized mental states, we experience them in a fleeting and imprecise way.

The verbal thinker, especially, tends to think in this second-hand way: he skillfully manipulates symbols but rarely makes full contact with his own primary resources.

Visual thinking is a marvelous antidote for this sterile, one-sided kind of thinking. Or more correctly, visual thinking, with its symbolically left-handed, primaryprocess origins, is a vital complement to symbolically right-handed, secondary-process thinking-by-words-and-numbers.

Take perception, for example. What sort of thinking may we expect from the thinker who verbally labels his experience before he has time to perceive its richness?

Since perception provides vital raw material for thinking, we may expec! I which conventionalized labels play a central role. Visual thinking, with its emphasis cn fresh and unlabeled perception see Chap?

I am not suggesting that we abandon words: most of the experiences in this book on visual thinking would be extremely difficult to present nonverbally.

My point is that visual and language thinking are complementary. The same case can be made in connection with sensory imagination.

The importance of this primary kind of imagination to thinking in every field cannot be overstressed.

Do you suppose, for example, that mathematicians think only in relation to mathematical symbols? In your imagination, fold it once now having two layers , fold it once more now having four layers , and continue.

How thick is the fifty-times-folded paper? Most people cannot sustain this imaginative feat beyond several foldings. Even if they could, the image would be impossible to scan: by mathematical calculation, you will find the fifry-times-folded thickness is in the order of the distance from here to the sun!

As Hadamard has shown, most creative mathematicians are visual thinkers: the previous problem suggests why math- 21 ematicians also use abstract mathematical language.

Again, it is not a question of one or the other: sensory imagination and symbolic thinking are comp! In a similar vein, visual thinking complements abstract-language thinking by its power to concretize.

Similarly, thinkers who cannot escape the structure of language, who are unaware that thinking can occur in ways having little to do with language, are often utilizing only that small part of their brain that is indeed like a computer.

This is the reason that true creativity often starts where language ends. He abandons language when occasion demands, and enters into other modes of thought.

Specifically, the creative thinker is ambidextrous: he uses his symbolic left hand as well as his right, his right brain as well as his left.

Learning to think visually is vital to this integrated kind of mental activity. Verbal and mathematical symbols are strung together linearly in conventional patterns such as those afforded by grammar.

Mentally tracking these linear structures automatically enforces certain thinking operations. Like fingering beads, the thinker follows the verbal or mathematical pattern piece by piece, toward a single end.

Visual imagery, by reference8 Bruner, J. On Knowing: Essays for Ihe Leff Hand. The Belknap Press of Harvard University Press. Maslow, A.

Parnes and Ii. Cognitive Psychology. Cornsweet: T. Hadamard, J. The Psychology ol invention in the Malhematical Field.

Princeton Uni4. Bartlett, F. Cambridge University Press. Koestfer, A. The Act of Creation. Thinking processes actually are automatic, swift, and spontaneous when allowed to proceed undisturbed by other influences.

Therefore, what we need is to be educated in how not to interfere with the inherent capacity of the human mind to think.

Instead, he is advocating the most difficult educatlonal condition of all: a healthy psychological climate. Education that does not interfere with thinking, according to Kubie, must be free of neurosisinducing educational practices, such as repetitive memory drill.

It must also be expertly responsive to neurotic blocks in the thinking of individual students. For an education without such instruction will produce adults who are destined eventually to become crippled by their own obsolete patterns of thought and by knowledge that is no longer relevant, to become confused and then overwhelmed by a vastly changed future society in which they will no longer know how to participate.

In the strategy method, the student is not only challenged to think, he is also taught how to apply a number of thinking strategies.

He is taught, for example, that the thinker who fluently produces a number of possible solutions to a problem is usually more successful than the thinker who settles for one solution.

Learning this, the student then utilizes fluent ideation as a strategy for improving the quality of his thinking. A number of thinking strategies also called heuristics have been identified and can be taught in conjunction with the discovery method.

As Kubie suggests, neurotic blocks to thinking are extremely common. Few educators, however, have the knowledge, skill, or time for a psychotherapeutic approach to the education of thinking.

Also, outside of art and design education, few educators are aware that thinking can occur in other than verbal and mathematical modes. Yet sensory modes of thought, especially the visual mode, are at the very heart of thinking.

What can be done to teach visual thinking? Both are essential for wholesome mental development. Art allows for harmless individual self-expression of thought which every person needs.

Opportunity for visual expression usually ceases early in the primary grades. Only in kindergarten and first grade is education based on the cooperation of all the essential powers of the mind; thereafter this natural and sensible procedure is dismissed as an obstacle to training in the proper kind of abstraction.

Any mental ability that is not exercised decays, and visual ability is no exception. Consider the result of this atrophy in the simple act of seeing.

Taught always to name what they see, many students learn to label the visual stimulus too quickly, before they see it fully. For example, the word-dependent individual rarely sees trees in all their many shades of green and trunk-bark-limb-twig-leaf complexity.

Instead, he sees trees as abstract visual concepts, vague green blobs on a stick. This profound perceptual loss is also reflected in lost imagination.

Asked to recall the image of a specific tree, the worddependent individual sees either no inner image or the image of a vague, stereotyped tree.

Asked to draw a tree, the individual whose visual ability has atrophied can only draw a primitive green lollipop. Perceptual loss is often caused by self-consciousness: the individual who a!

The obstacles to visual edusation are many. Whatever the inheritance, the unrealized potential for visual development is great. Even the visually apt have room for improvement: writes psychologist I.

Almost everyone can learn to see more fully, to imagine more productively, and to express their visual ideas by drawing. Courtroom lawyers know by experience, and psychologists by experiment, that seeing is enormaClsly influenced by personal factors such as emotion, knowledge, and viewpoint.

Look at this page. Have you noticed the kind, size, and density of the type? A typesetter surely would have. Or the composition of the paper?

Or its coloration? Contrary to common belief, seeing is an active art to be developed, not a passive experience to be taken for granted. The mator difficulty most people confront is their inability to contact their imagination consciously and to direct it productively.

Like seeing, directed imagination is an art that can be developed. No one who dreams lacks imagination-and everyone dreams.

To be sure, there are visually talented peop! More to the point, the impulse to draw is universal in young child;en, despite the common scarcity of parents who draw.

Were education to nurture this natural drawing impulse, as it does reading and writing, virtually everyone would draw. Intensity and quality of thinking bears a direct relationship to provocation, The individual confronted with an unresolved situation that he finds fascinating and worthwhile to resolve stands a far better chance to develsp his thinking abilities than a person presented with a puzzle he deems uninteresting.

Of course, a meaningful challenge to one person may very well prove to be a bore to another. An architect and an engineer will not likely be challenged by the same problem; indeed, two people in the same discipline will not be equally challenged by the same problem.

Only you can identify the kind of challenge that will stimulate you to think deeply. If you read a magazine article about a problem that interests you, put it on the list.

As you proceed in this book, try to appiy visual thinking strategies toward the solution ot these problems that personally inierest you. This book does not prerend to present you and your neighbor with problems that challenge you both to think at your best.

It cannot. Seek your own challenges and you will find that visual thinking applies to every sort of problem. In the section on preparations, you are introduced to the tools, materials, and the environmental conditions that are conducive to visual thinking.

Visual thinking, whether it be in the context of seeing. Experiences in drawing afford another way to invigorate vision.

By drawing, you will experience the pattern-seeking as well as the analytical nature of seeing, and you will explore perceptual cues that make the visual world three-dimensional.

Here you experience various kinds of inner imagery, from autonomous dream and hypnogogic imagery through directed fantasy to logical, abstract, and structural imagery.

The thrust of these experiences is to open up inner imaginative resources essential to creative visual thinking.

Your attention is directed outward again in the section on idea-sketching. Other strategies for thinking with your pencil, such as visual brainstorming and development-by-overlay, are also presented.

IO sbgle way There is no single way to experience the material presented in this book. Indeed, a step-by-step procedure is not recommended. Visual thinking in relation to a challenging problem does not proceed in cookbook fashion for example, 1 recenter your viewpoint, 2 add a dab of inner imagery, 3 now make six sketches, 4 cook in the brain overnight.

Visual thinking that is equipped with a rich repertoire of visual responses moves far more flex- ibly. Consequently, learning to think visually should occur in a flexible way.

Individual needs must be recognized. In a classroom, for example, a few students will reveal themselves to I;e fluent, broad-brush thinkers at the start.

Far more will be constricted and myopic. Expansive thinkers quite frequently need to learn to converge their ideas, to take care with details.

Tight thinkers, by contrast, need to loosen up, tc release their thinking from details. The individual whose drawings show a flair for concrete realism, for example, frequently finds abstract thinking difficult.

To increase skill in abstraction, this individual should use graphic languages that embody abstract relationships see Chapter 21 and draw images that are highly abstract, such as thumbnail sketches see Chapter It is also important to recognize that visualthinking styles vary.

Some visual thinkers are most at home working threedimensionally: others like Tesla operate very well with inner images; and still others think best with pencil and paper.

The teacher of visual thinking naturally favors his own style: he should be careful not to impose it on an entire class. Initial learning experiences in visual thinking should be short and well-related to present knowledge.

Many short problems encourage thinking flexibility; problems that do not require information-gathering allt w more time for deveioping thinking skill.

Design and build a device that does this. Once skill and confidence are developed with short problems such as this, the visual thinker is ready to turn to longer, informationdependent problems in his field of proiessional interest.

Were are three other sugges? The more eyes, the better. Compare observations; what your neighbor sees and what you see of the same stimulus can be quite different, and educationally so.

Discuss your dreams and experiences with inner imagery with other people. Such discussions help lift the social taboo on imagination that is a major block to fluent and flexible visual thinking.

Cover your walls with drawings and idea-sketches, including examples and reproductions of drawings by other people. Also watch accomplished sketchers at work.

Much visual learning occurs by direct example. You will get a feel for how to use this book by using it. Spend several days simply experiencing the experiences, making notes of experiences that you believe you should repeat.

In the last chapter, I will suggest how to use the book in relation to future problems that challenge you.

Learning to think visually is, of course, a lifetime pursuit; mastery is achieved not by performing exercises but by solving real problems.

Neurotic Distortion of the Creative Process. Olton, Ft. Mussen, J. Langer, and M. Holt, Rinehart 8 Winston. Kellogg, R. The Esfhetic Eye ot the Preschool Child.

InternationalChild Art Center, San Francisco. The first describes materials and environmental conditions that are especially conducive to visual thinking.

The second introduces the value of an inner state of relaxed attention. Materials and Environment 6. Relaxed Attention 29 vb1al4blnBclng materbls and environanent material8 Although visual ideas can be captured with whatever is at hand-a stubby pencil on the back of an old envelope, a finger in the moist surface of a sandy beach-a discussion of visualization materials may nevertheless be helpful.

Given a choice, the visual thinker should be choosey: not all visualization materials are well-suited to visual thinking. Materials that involve the visualizer in difficult techniques, for instance, will absorb his energy and divert his attention away from thinking.

Timeconsuming techniques also impede rapid ideation, since ideas frequently come more quickly than they can be recorded.

Frustration with an unwieldy material can block a train of thought or be reflected directly in diminished quality of thinking. The best materials for visual thinking are direct, quick, and easy to use.

Drawing materials are necessary to many of the experiences in the chapters tha! The following list introduces the kinds of materials that will make these experiences most rewarding.

Note: when buying felt-tip markers, consider warm grays Magic Markers 2 and 4 or Prismacolor and , for example for quickly rendered shading effects.

Try different markers and paper combinations. Experiment with line quality, such as light strokes and bold strokes. Which markers are best for filling in solid tones?

G;GdLEiitXi iNitS 7 Which marker-paper combination gives you the most pleasure? Well- supplied art-materials stores carry markers of many kinds.

Try carbon, charcoal, pastel, and lithograph pencils. Many visualizers also enjoy using pens such as the Rapidograph or Koh-i-noor.

A word of caution: drawings made with markers such as pastel and charcoal, even when sprayed with fixative, are messy to store.

Costly paper tends to inhibit thinking. Newsprint paper, convenient to buy by the pad, is cheaper by the ream sheets or roll.

Manila wrapping paper, purchased by the roll. Keep in mind, though, that inexpensive pulp papers discolor and become brittle with age. Rag-content papers should be used for permanent records.

Although more expensive, they are more stable chemically and possess additional virtues of whiteness, erasability, and hard finish.

In addition to the drawing tools listed, you may also want to purchase a plastic triangle. Visual ideas are generally best recorded freehand, with a minimum of tools.

Mockup materials have not been so well developed by manufacturers as have drawing materials. Clay, the traditional sketch material of the sculptor, has many disadvantages to weigh against its basic advantage of malleability.

Styrofoam is an important alternative to clay: it is relatively stiff, can be easily formed into a hollow structure, and can be glued.

Geometric forms are usually best developed with sheet materials. Sheet thermoplastic such as Plexiglas or styrene is easily cut by scoring and breaking, is formable with heat, and is quickly joined with plastic solvent.

Foamcore, a laminated paper-andStyrofoam sandwich, affords a stiff and light sheet material that cuts like butter: it is especially good for large mockups.

Of course, all visualization materials can be used in combination. A free sense of experimentation is the key. Pleasurable play with materials is a very tempting alternative to productive mental activity.

For example, a quickly developed Polaroid transparency of a small sketch can be projected on a wall-size piece of paper.

Photographs and drawings can be combined. Slide projectors can be used to stimulate visual thinking-for example, by means of multi-screen projections of visual material reievant and perhaps irrelevant to the task at hand.

The visual thinker, in an era of advanced optical technology, is not limited to what he can see with his naked eye. An extremely important preparation, therefore, is creating an environment conducive to visual thinking.

A visual-thinking environment for one person should be as well-designed as a contemporary kitchen. Work areas should be well-illuminated, preferably with natural north light and without shadow or glare.

The drawing surface should be large and adjustable in height and angle. An additional stand-up table should be available for three-dimensional work: spilled glue and-knife marks soon spoil a drawing surface.

Organized storage should be provided close to each work area to diminish dislracting clutter. Chairs and stools should provide back support in the working position.

To alleviate back tension, and also to provide for the important element of change, a stand-up, vertical drawing stirface should be available: a blackboard.

A large tack-space is needed for displaying current idea-sketches. Although admittedly an affront to those who associate productive work with open eyes and erect posi- tion, the visual thinker should also have access to a quiet place where he can relax and turn his thoughts inward-or stop thinking entirely: a reclining chair, a couch, even a relaxing bath!

Johnson needed to have a purring cat, orange peel, and plenty of tea to drink. Zola pulled down the blinds at midday because he found more stimulus for his thought in artificial light.

Carlyle was forever trying to construct a soundproof room, while Proust achieved one. Schiller seems to have depended on the smell of decomposing apples which he habitually kept concealed in his desk.

Some believe that auperior ideas are invariably the gift of a single individual who does his thinking alone.

Although these opinions are not mutually exclusive, one cannot entertain the possibility of group-thirik. It can be easily demonstrated, for example, that five people sitting in a straight line cannot interact verbally as well as can five people sitting in a circle.

When the interchange is visual as well as verbal, such environmental considerations are even more crucial to group effectiveness.

I pose no solutions for an optimal environment for visual group-think: I only mention a few of the problems.

Clearly, an interactive group needs to be able to work over a shared visual image, suggesting modifications and changes.

A group working at a single blackboard can do this. But at a blackboard. One problem is the need for a memory device. Also, how is the group going to generate a variety of visual concepts and then.

When a system for visual group-think is devised, it will very likely incorporate a graphic computer system that will permit colleagues to interact even though separated by thousands of miles.

At this writing, the full potential of the graphic computer has not yet been realized But what is in hypothetical or experimental form now will likely be in prevalent use in the near future.

Figure the graphic computer The graphic computer is rapidly becoming :tn extremely important tool for visual thinking.

An Interactive graphic computet. D Drawing. A Studv Guide. McKellar, P lmaginalion and Think ng Basic Books. Relaxation involves loosening up, letting go, and, finally-ho-hum-going to sleep.

Attention involves focusing energy, finding excitement in discovery-aha! Ho-hum and aha! Together, how are they related to visual thinking?

Relaxation and attention are two sides of the same paradoxical coin. By relaxing irrelevant tension, the individual releases full energy and attention to the task at hand.

Watch any masterful performance-a rhythmic golf swing, a breathtaking bal! Relaxation is important to thinking generally. We not only move with it.

Be reminded, however, thai the totally relaxed individual cannot think at all. Physiologists have shown that some muscular tension is needed to generate and attend mental processes.

Some tension, but not too much: relaxed attention. The moment my head touches the pillow I fall asleep with the problem unsolved.

Again, relaxed attention. Then, if one is wise. Memory works best, it would seem, when the mind is in a state of dynamic relaxation.

Excessive eye tension interferes with seeing: directed imagination is enhanced by a disciplined form of letting go: visual ideas flow most 33 freely onto paper when the marker is held and moved with graceful ease.

Sleepy-sagginess-collapse is the opposite pole to hyper-tension. When we tense our muscles, we do so to make a response.

But why do we over-tense our muscles? What are the causes of excessive tension? By far the most fundamental cause of hypertension is fear. The fearful or insecure person tenses his body because he believes that he will soon face a real or imagined attack or catastrophe.

At work, he overreacts and burns energy needlessly, or does not act at all-in each instance, to avoid failure. At home in bed, he fusses and worries: his body lense, he cannot go to sleep.

Unable to relax, the fearful individual also finds it difficult lo maintain attention. Every distraction is interpreted as a potential threat or an opportunity for relief.

Easily diverted, he becomes flicting menial prone to the con- agenda and immobile ten- sion tnat characterize Ihe indecisive.

Excessive tension has physical as well as psychological causes When energy level arid :nuscular slruciure are inadequale lo the response demanded of them, excessive tension results.

The relatively unmuscular intellectual, for example. Josephine Rathbone, in Rela.! But how rare is that person! Jacobsen claims that by relaxing these muscular tensions, ability to mainlain the negalive psychological slate is diminished The totally relaxed individual, Jacobsen has demonstrated, cannot entertain any kind oi thinking al all, worriful or constructive.

Can the psychosomatic cycle of fear and tension be broken by deep physical relaxalion3 Possibiy not wlthout experl and sustained training in relaxation techniques, and, in exlreme cases, probably not withcut additional expert psychological counsel.

Try them. They are excellent preparation for visual thinking and may even have additional benefits. Relaxation experts generally agree that the first step in eliminating excessive muscular tension is to become aware that you are tense.

The next step is to realize that you are responsible for your excessive tension. The final step is to learn to let go of tension voluntarily. Ways of letting go take two forms: dynamic and passive.

Dynamic letting go involves activity; passive letting go involves lying down and going limp. Very slowly bend your head forward three times.

Then slowly circle your head through the same movements, clockwise then reverse, three times each. Go slowly and gently; most civilized necks are sliff.

You will likely have to do this exercise several weeks before you can do it comfortably. Close your eyes and sit quietly for several minutes.

Allow your attention lo systematically explore the muscle sensations of your body: your face muscles, neck muscles, shoulders, and so on down.

Where are you excessively tense right now? Now, stand up and stretch-slowly, gracefully, and luxuriantly, like a cat. As you do, inhale deeply and feel the lens on in your body.

Wtlh a generous sigh, exhale, sit down, and relax. As you do, feel the tension letting go. Sustain this passive sensation for several minutes.

Holding Ihe heavy human head over a desk for long 3. With the fingers of both hands, massage the nape of your neck near the back of the skull.

Better yet, invite a friend to massage your neck and shoulder muscles gently with long strokes down along the back of the neck and shoulders.

Then return the favor. Take a deep breath and, with a sigh, let go excess neck and shoulder tension. Sit or stand erecl.

Let your arms and hands hang loosely al your sides, like wet spaghetti. As loosely as possible, shake your hand. Extend this aclion to your forearm, your entire arm.

Let your arm rise over head, shaking the entire limb iooseiy vigorously. Stop and compare the feeling of your right arm with that of your left.

Repeat with your left arm. The importance of relaxed vision to visual thinking should go without saying. Tired, strained eyes interfere not only with visual thinking but with efficient mental functioning generally.

Precede this passive form of eye relaxation by gently massaging your temples and the nape 01 your neck and by blinking to lubricate your eyes.

To avoid exerting any pressure on the eyeballs which should never be pressed, massaged, rubbed, or otherwise handled the lower part of the palms should rest upon the cheekbones, the fingers upon the forehead.

When the eyes are closed and all light has been excluded by the hands, people vith relaxed organs of vision see their sense-field uniformly filled with blackness.

Turn your imagination to a pleasurable scene involving black: a furry black cat resting on a large black velvet pillow, or the night sky.

You may have to palm your eyes several times a day, and for a period of time, before your inner field ot vision takes on the deep and rich blackness that characterizes complete eye relaxation.

By brmging muscles! Wrinkle your forehead upward. Become aware of the muscles that are controlling the tension, and progressively let them go.

Frown tightly and let go. Shut your eyes tightly and let go. With eyes open, look to the far left, become aware of the muscles involved, and let go.

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REAL BLK MAN - : comments : trackback 0. I'm not into working out. My philosophy: No pain, no pain. Rarely is the question asked: Is our children learning?

I do not fear computers. I fear the lack of them. Humor is by far the most significant activity of the human brain. If you think it's simple, then you have misunderstood the problem.

Only one man ever understood me, and he didn't understand me. Make everything as simple as possible, but not simpler.

There is a country in Europe where multiple-choice tests are illegal. Maybe this world is another planet's Hell.

Copy from one, it's plagiarism; copy from two, it's research. The only way to get rid of a temptation is to yield to it.

Those are my principles. If you don't like them I have others. It is a miracle that curiosity survives formal education. Research is what I'm doing when I don't know what I'm doing.

I'd give my right arm to be ambidextrous. I don't know anything about music. In my line you don't have to. I am not young enough to know everything.

Everything that can be invented has been invented. It is better to be quotable than to be honest. Once you've written TBicycle, you never forget how.

It is better to have a permanent income than to be fascinating. When I die I'm going to leave my body to science fiction.

The backbone of surprise is fusing speed with secrecy. It's wonderful to be here in the great state of Chicago. I have seen the future and it is just like the present, only longer.

No one can earn a million dollars honestly. Gravity cannot be held responsible for people falling in love. When you hear hoofbeats, think of horses, not zebras.

If you can count your money, you don't have a billion dollars. I never miss a chance to have sex or appear on television.

If absolute power corrupts absolutely, where does that leave God? People who think they know everything greatly annoy those of us who do.

Humor is also a way of saying something serious. Don't drive me crazy -- it's within walking distance. The cynics are right nine times out of ten.

You're about as useful as a one-legged man at an arse kicking contest. Opportunities multiply as they are seized. Education is a progressive discovery of our own ignorance.

We all agree that your theory is crazy, but is it crazy enough? Attention to health is life's greatest hindrance. UNIX is simple. It just takes a genius to understand its simplicity.

Learning is what most adults will do for a living in the 21st century. I think there is a world market for maybe five computers.

Ah well, then I suppose I shall have to die beyond my means. I have not failed. I've just found 10, ways that won't work. The best way to predict the future is to invent it.

My opinions might have changed, but not the fact that I am right. Go on, get out. Last words are for fools who haven't said enough.

A single death is a tragedy, a million deaths is a statistic. Whenever I climb I am followed by a dog called 'Ego'.

Never test for an error condition you don't know how to handle. Good teaching is one-fourth preparation and three-fourths theater.

A sure cure for seasickness is to sit under a tree. Argue for your limitations, and sure enough they're yours. Ever stop to think, and forget to start again?

I have never let my schooling interfere with my education. Wit makes its own welcome and levels all distinctions. Talent does what it can; genius does what it must.

I have had a perfectly wonderful evening, but this wasn't it. I could not possibly fail to disagree with you less.

A man can't get rich if he takes proper care of his family. I'm not going to get into the ring with Tolstoy. Smoking is one of the leading causes of statistics.

For if he like a madman lived, At least he like a wise one died. I have often regretted my speech, never my silence. If you believe in telekinesis, raise my hand.

A state of war only serves as an excuse for domestic tyranny. If you gaze long into an abyss, the abyss will gaze back into you. The covers of this book are too far apart.

Guard against the impostures of pretended patriotism. I don't care to belong to a club that accepts people like me as members.

Violence is the last refuge of the incompetent. Wise men make proverbs, but fools repeat them. It is better to be feared than loved, if you cannot be both.

Silence is argument carried out by other means. A narcissist is someone better looking than you are. I must confess, I was born at a very early age.

They laughed when I said I'd be a comedian. They aren't laughing now. Minsky's Second Law: Don't just do something. Stand there.

Egotist: a person more interested in himself than in me. You'll notice that Nancy Reagan never drinks water when Ronnie speaks. He has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire.

I have four children which is not bad considering I'm not a Catholic. A man can't be too careful in the choice of his enemies.

Nine out of ten doctors agree that one out of ten doctors is an idiot. Behind every great fortune there is a crime. Being on the tightrope is living; everything else is waiting.

I'm desperately trying to figure out why kamikaze pilots wore helmets. I'd stop eating chocolate, but I'm no quitter. It's clearly a budget.

It's got a lot of numbers in it. There is no sincerer love than the love of food. Let him who takes the Plunge remember to return it by Tuesday. The only difference between me and a madman is that I'm not mad.

You never really learn to swear until you learn to drive. If there is no God, who pops up the next Kleenex?

My occupation now, I suppose, is jail inmate. I choose a block of marble and chop off whatever I don't need.

Total absence of humor renders life impossible. The difference between pornography and erotica is lighting.

The purpose of computing is not numbers but insight. Roses are FF Violets are FF All my base are belong to you! The only way to combat criminals is by not voting for them.

Manuscript: something submitted in haste and returned at leisure. Don't be so humble - you are not that great.

My current job sucks so hard, black holes are going green with envy. Most people would sooner die than think; in fact, they do so.

Men have become the tools of their tools. The President has kept all of the promises he intended to keep. You can pretend to be serious; you can't pretend to be witty.

In this world, nothing is certain but death and taxes. When you have to kill a man, it costs nothing to be polite. Ask her to wait a moment - I am almost done.

Jesus may love you, but I think you're garbage wrapped in skin. If it wasn't for muscle spasms, I wouldn't get any exercise at all. We're going to turn this team around degrees.

Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go. Common sense is the collection of prejudices acquired by age eighteen.

Never raise your hands to your kids. It leaves your groin unprotected. The difference between fiction and reality?

Fiction has to make sense. All things are possible, except skiing through a revolving door. Everybody wants to go to heaven, but nobody wants to die.

The full use of your powers along lines of excellence. To err is human -- and to blame it on a computer is even more so. Imitation is the sincerest form of television.

But at my back I always hear Time's winged chariot hurrying near. Everything has been figured out, except how to live.

Don't stay in bed, unless you can make money in bed. Money is better than poverty, if only for financial reasons. If a man does his best, what else is there?

I've just learned about his illness. Let's hope it's nothing trivial. If you can read this you're not aiming in the right direction.

It's the liberal bias. The press is liberally biased to the right. When the rich think about the poor, they have poor ideas.

When ideas fail, words come in very handy. Who are you going to believe, me or your own eyes?

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